I spent some time talking with my unit during our repair time, and I learned some very important information. Let’s start with the Captain - he perceives only the inside of the mech cockpit and is somehow able to tell when he reassociates as he is to conscious of pilot the mech. He describe no dreams or anything. Does he perceive the gap as a blink? The next thing I should ask is he experiences any physical exhaustion after “the blink”. The Captain was seemingly not aware of whatever Mercury’s “waves” are either.

Does this mean that the waves are a compartmentalisation of Mercury’s own creation? If so, it stands to reason that Mercury probably has created more terms and concepts for things he experiences. Is Mercury aware of social constructs like gender and race, or does he not have any reason to try and identify or differentiate things unimportant to the battlefield? The existence of what I refer to as the Mercury Interaction Protocol, or the MIP, probably means that there is no blocker programmed to stop him from thinking those thoughts, or else there would be no need for safeguards. I’m torn on whether to introduce these ideas to him to see hoe he would react or to follow the MIP and see what he comes up with naturally.

I also had a lovely chat with the Mechanic, where I confirmed he is definitely a mechanic and that the dog people are plentiful in Castiria. I learn so much from him, he’s truly a fountain of endless knowledge. I watched him work during the repairs and then tried to copy his moves as best as I could. I’m glad to have a mentor like him on the team unit.

We are on our way back after completing the mission There is so much information to record here. I’ll start with the least important - no need for me to try and be more militaristic in my approach in combat. I did exactly what I always do and achieved results that the squad unit deemed positive. I guess I was just unlucky during the ambush.

Now for the interesting stuff. We encountered some holy men from something called the Church of Materialism. I was in charge of speaking to them, and I was attempting to appear as a soldier would so I couldn’t ask them about their beliefs. The leader identified themselves as a Bishop, I wonder how high of a rank that is? Before things devolved into combat, the Bishop performed some kind of “soul measure” which declared the Captain and the politicians as having heavy souls, They did not disclose how this measure worked but they certainly believe that a heavy soul is a bad thing. I got the feeling they’re a known force in the area so maybe I can look them up when we get back and figure out their belief systems. If they have an objective measure of spirituality, it is vital I understand how they do it so I can add it to the United Belief. I don’t trust this church though, the Bishop said one too many times that they were a force for good. And as that old saying goes - Good Men Don’t Need To Guarantee They’re Good.

As the whole scene played out at the base, strange things were afoot with Mercury. Before combat started, we had a brief chat where they asked me if I was a wave. I confirmed I wasn’t but attempts to get a definition of what a wave actually was failed again. I asked them if he was a wave but got no response, as we were shortly interrupted by the Captain returning. If this was all, then I would have dismissed it as nothing of note. But.

Something more did in fact happen. After landing the final blow on the Bishop, Mercury seemed to have some kind of mental break, and started clawing at their chest. The Mechanic, the smart man that he is, restrained Mercury. I broke MIP in an attempt to shock Mercury back to normal, calling him Captain. That’s a half-truth. I wished to see what happens if they heard the phrase Captain, but I fear the panic attack rendered my experiment useless. Drawing on the limited psychological knowledge I have, I switched tacts and tried to calm them down by saying the waves are gone This calmed Mercury enough to discuss the source of their panic, leading to an amazing revelation - Mercury perceives themselves as the mech itself. They were scared of seeing the flesh body inside another mech. I assume they view our human bodies as something akin to a cancer or a parasite - a foreign, unwelcome invader. I deflected any questions about if I “had one” inside me and tried to keep them calm until the Captain returned. To what extent does Mercury view themself as the robot? Do they somehow only see through the sensors? Is de-association actually about separating the Captain’s brain from his body so that it’s an unconscious conduit between the being known as Mercury and the controls of the mech? Does that mean Mercury will never truly feel the sun on their rface or the texture of paper? My head is practically spinning with thoughts and theories.

Churches, de-associations and the still unknown Red Object. So many questions, all of which could impact the United Belief. For now, I’ll rest until we’re back at the Chateau and then it’s time to hit the books.

Soul, flesh, skin, bone. The four pillars of the Church of Materialism. Isn’t flesh and skin the same thing, or is there some hidden meaning to differentiate the two?

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Okay seriously, is it squad or is it unit? Because people are using squad more than unit, to the point that someone called us Squad 02. An academic like me needs some consistency.

I’ve gotten ahead of myself. Today we met with some military bigwig called the Director. Interesting man, he’s got a sensitivity to light. I wonder if that’s some kind of war injury. We had a debrief where we went over our key mission details. The Director said that while they had no data on the R.O. (which he called the Unknown Entity, strange name for it if you ask me), he felt it was similar to a paracausal incident 4 years ago. He was light on the details about that particular topic, saying we’d be looped in if it ends up being relevant. Not sure I believe a single word of that though.

For now, despite our mission apparently being perceived as a failure, we’ve got the chance to pick what we want to do when we’re next deployed. I’m keen to return to the mines and learn about the R.O. more. I’m doubtful it is actually a religious symbol after hearing the possible paracausal link but I’m still extremely curious.

One thing of note during our chat - The Director said you need to look into a man’s eyes to understand him. Does he understand the irony of a man in the darkness saying that?

We’ve got some time before our next mission. I’ll spend some time with the engineers touching up Ithiki but after that, who knows what I’ll get up to. I could do some more research about Castirian history in the hopes of finding out anything about the 4 Year Ago Paracausal Incident (4YAPI). I should also try to find out more about the Church of Materialism, maybe I can find a parish in the city. I wonder where the gambling that politician mentioned is as well…